Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Why we decided to Home School this year

Let me first start off this post by saying that I in no way think that me and DJ have the whole education thing all figured out. I mean, hello, my oldest is only 4 and this is our first year and we are only just getting our feet wet in the world of homeschooling. My goal for this year is to take it easy, not push it, test the waters, and get a realistic idea of whether or not this is the trajectory we would like to continue on for Moses' elementary years. We do not think our decision is the best way, or the only way, and we have zero judgment on anyone pursuing a different route than us. I have attended forums where Christian families talk about the type of education they chose for their children and I am fascinated every time. Some of the most God-honoring families I know have chosen the various routes of public school, private school, and home school for their children; each one has done so based on the direction they felt God was leading them in and each of their reasons was encouraging, holy, and commendable. Me and DJ both grew up in the public school system, most of my closest friends have their kids in private or university model schools, and until recently I knew almost zero families who home schooled. And yet, it is the decision that we have decided to pursue for our family and I could not be more excited about it. This post is simply about us and our journey and why we have made this decision. My next post will be about why we chose the Classical Conversations program so stay tuned for that, because obviously this is a topic worth being on the edge of your seat about.

One more little caveat: the title of this blog post suggests that we, me and DJ, made the decision to home school, but the reality is that DJ has entrusted nearly the entirety of this decision to me. Can I just brag on my husband a bit? Because over the course of our marriage, I have proven to feel very strongly about a few number of things that he cares much less about, but he has taken the time, thought, humility, and care to consider my stand point and has come out encouraging and supporting me every time. When we were pursuing a family, I felt very strongly that I wanted to stay at home to raise our kids and DJ did not see the value in it at the time. We both had working moms and were raised in day cares and we turned out fine so he didn't see the necessity to pursue me staying home if it did not make sense to do so financially, which believe me, it did not. Adopting Moses really helped aid our decision in this because we felt strongly that my staying home would expedite his bonding and transition into our family, but over the course of time DJ has valued my presence in the home so much that he now says he will do whatever he can and make as many sacrifices as we need to before I have to go back to work. Then, when we got pregnant with Jones, I felt very strongly that I wanted to pursue a natural, mid-wife assisted delivery in a birth center, and again DJ did not feel strongly one way or another about the kind of care I received. Hospital births were all he knew so it was completely outside of his realm to consider otherwise. But when I proposed a natural birth outside of the hospital, he took the time to watch documentaries, listen to the research I acquired, heard why it was important to me, and suddenly became an advocate for it himself! And again, with home school, can I just be honest and say that we were the people who made fun of home schoolers? Like, we thought they were awkward and dorky and anti-social and basically committed ourselves to never home schooling our own children. And then as I have seen how Moses is wired and grown in my role as a momma, I have become more and more drawn to the idea of educating at home. And DJ entrusted the decision to me, acknowledging that to do so would put a ton of weight and responsibility on my role as a wife and momma and that if it was a role I wanted to assume then he would support and encourage my desire to do so. I am not one to have strong opinions. Like ever. But I am thankful that when I do have them, my husband listens and honors and encourages and supports them. As I often sing Salt N Pepa style in my home, whatta man, whatta man, whatta mighty good man have I married. He is truly the best.

Anyway, on to my original point. Without further ado, here are the primary reasons that we are trying out Home School this year:

1. Crafts & Creativity. DJ bought me a laminator to prep and organize all my school supplies. I am in laminating heaven, you guys. This is 100% reason enough to Home School. I'm kidding. Kind of. Here is just one of the things I got super craft happy about: Our morning board!! See that blank spot on the right? I welcome all of your ideas for what to incorporate there.


2. Peace. The school question is one that lead me into serious anxiety. I could not have a conversation about it without having a questionable amount of pit sweat. And to be honest, home school actually started off in the top running simply by the process of elimination. I had some hesitancies about the public school system and private school was just not going to be a financial decision we could realistically afford. These two things alone made home school stand out as a top contender, but even then I was uncertain and overwhelmed at which route to take. And yet, the more I learned about home school and researched the various models and programs that are out there, the more confident and encouraged I felt. And gradually, my pits stopped sweating and all that was left was peace and excitement. Peace goes a long way and in this case, it felt like confirmation.

3. Time, flexibility, and simplicity! These are all values that our family prioritizes. For your sake,  I'll break these three up in order to make this post appear shorter than it actually is. You're welcome.

As for time, I love that home school allows for so much togetherness. A lot of family time is never a bad thing so we want to get as much of it as we can, especially in these little years when their minds are hearts are still so very formative. Not only that, but I think it is hard for any momma to send her 5 year old off to Kindergarten, but in Moses' case, we have only had him for (less than) three years and I am still soaking up every minute with him and still making up for so much lost time.

Home school also allows for a lot of flexibility. I am not naive that home schooling can be difficult; I think in many ways it can be the harder route. But I also appreciate that school will allow us to take breaks when needed, to blow off steam and frustration, and to let my crazy boys burn off all their energy. I've heard that it is hard for young boys to sit still for long periods of time and that they learn well through action and activity so I like that this method will both give me opportunities to train them to sit still, all the while allowing them to learn while zooming cars or shooting a basketball or running laps through the house when needed. I also appreciate the flexibility of getting outside to enjoy nature, learning in the backyard, having play dates with friends, getting to run errands and continuing to do normal life, all in the midst of our home school day. I don't think that education is separate from the rest of life and I look forward to continuing to teach while grocery shopping, baking a pie, doing laundry, or whatever else I am doing that I can invite them into. And, let's be honest, rushing out the door to get my kids to school on time sounds a little bit like death to me. I can do it, but I cannot do it well and probably not without yelling at and harping on my kids. I love our slow mornings and easing into our day. I love that home school will allow us the space to build our own schedule. With a baby on the way, flexibility is something we need to strive for and be okay with.

And simplicity! We strive for so much of this and it is like swimming upstream in today's culture. But I really do think that home school will allow for more of this and will keep things chill and low key, less competitive, and will hopefully reduce the pressure I would inevitably feel to "keep up with the Jones'" if we were invited to 25 birthday parties a year and had to be in all the sports and camps and activities that all the other kids were in. I'm going to ignore those things a little bit longer, yes please.

4. Gifting & Skill Set. I have surprised myself as a mom. I think I thought I would be super fun and would play all the cars and build all the legos and take them all the places, but I kind of suck at those things. But I have seen that what I most enjoy and am most strong in and gifted at is teaching. Who would have thought?! Any opportunity to teach, disciple, read, and converse with my kids is where I thrive and find joy and these are the things that I feel surprisingly good at. I just never knew this about myself. I worked as a Children's Ministry Assistant for 7 years and not once felt confident, at ease, or in my comfort zone when the opportunity to teach a room full of kids presented itself. But it turns out that I stored up all of those years of children's doctrine in my heart, and they flow out with so much joy onto my children. I am so excited about the opportunity to teach my kids, and I actually think I might be good at it. I want to leverage that opportunity and gifting while I can.

5. Moses' wiring. When we got Moses, his foster family told us that he was bright. And because we had never spent any amount of time with any two year olds, we didn't know what that meant, but goodness, their words have proven to be true. Almost immediately we discovered that Moses had a gift with words, transitioned languages so easily, and spoke with such great articulation and maturity. He is four years old and reads at a first grade level, which I don't like admitting because I think it sounds braggy, but honestly I think this has very little to do with me and moreso is just evidence of how he is wired and that he is able to see letters and easily connect them into words. I appreciate that the home school model that we are doing will allow me to keep him alongside his peer group, as well as teach him at his level without being confined to a standard one size fits all curriculum. I want to continue encouraging, challenging, and cultivating these strong suits and I fear that he would end up being neglected by teachers and grow bored with reading if we were in a more traditional setting. At the same time, we have spent almost zero time learning other normal things for kids his age, so I think being in a class with other 4 year olds will help him to stay on track with what he should be learning at his age.

6. Christian education. I love that home school allows for God to be a part of our learning experience. In the program that we are doing, God is central to every subject that we will discuss. Everything my kids will learn will point to God and His good and wise design. I don't think that faith & education can be or should be separate entities from one another and I love how the home school experience will allow us to practically live out the command in Deuteronomy 6 to talk about God diligently with my children, from the moment we rise in the morning until we go to bed at night. A 7 hour day without mention of God or the opportunity to pray or to talk about His world and His ways and His wisdom may one day come, but while my kiddos are so young and impressionable and formative, I hope to integrate God into every aspect of our life as often as I can.

7. Protection. I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say that protection and fear had a little something to do with our decision. Obviously, I feel both of those things to a certain degree, although I really don't think it's the primary motivation behind our decision. And, I also do think that wisdom is mixed in there somewhere as well. I desire to teach my kids about the world and to expose them to secular ideas and worldviews, but I also want to be the one to first introduce them to those things. I want to teach those things through the lens of the gospel, talk through them in a way that I know they can understand, and provide a safe place for them to ask questions and give honest answers. I am not ready to put them in the hands of friends and families and educators who do not share our same beliefs and values and trust that they will teach and expose certain things in the ways that we want our children to first learn and hear about them. I want the opportunity to be able to define terms and explain how and why God created and designed things the way He did without entrusting such monumental details to strangers that I have never met. And, Moses in particular is a follower through and through. He pays attention to what others say and do and longs to fit in with the crowd. He is easily influenced and while I most definitely want my children to learn to be in the world without being of the world, Moses for one is not ready to be thrown to the wolves. I hope to spend these young years cultivating certain traits in him so that if and when the time comes to put him in a more traditional setting, he will be equipped to be a leader or influencer or missionary or wise follower in that place.

So there you have it.... our reasons for pursuing home school this year, and that's all that they are: our reasons and no one else's.

And just for free, this is a great podcast to listen to in this regard. In it, two godly mommas are interviewed and talk about the reasons God lead them to public school verses home school and they discuss how they have faithfully followed God in each of their decisions.

Much love,
Courtney